His Knight in Shining Armor
by MiyuKazu
Summary: Every little girl had dreamed of being a princess at one point in her life. Every little girl wished for a handsome prince or a gallant knight in shining armor. There was one problem with this situation though. Squalo most definitely was not a little girl. He also had never even thought of becoming a princess; especially not since meeting that bastard Belphegor. (Bovino Lux Uni)


**Disclaimer:** LOL I WISH I OWNED KHR. 'CAUSE THEN I'D BE ABLE TO COMPETE WITH NARUTO OVER THE LONGEST FUCKING ANIME.

 **A/N** : Ayo, I just want to let you guys know that I totally did not forget about updating my story.

I was just working out the story's timeline and how to write certain things with a friend.

I also decided to let my friend make an OC for my story to thank her so I introduce Valentine Violetta.

My friend's the one who drew Violetta btw. Isn't she amazing?

Anyway, Violetta won't be incorporated into my story for a while but I really want to introduce you guys to her so…here you go!

 **Warning** : The author of this story and Squalo both have EXTREMELY EXTREME potty mouths.  
Pardon our French C;  
-getitcausethisstorytakesplaceinFranceehuehuehuehue-

* * *

"IT IS TIME TO FIGHT JUSTICE!" Violetta screeched at the top of her lungs in terribly accented English upon exiting her home. She'd been inspired by the morning's Powah Rangers episode, an edition that warned kids of the dangers of trusting random strangers off the street.

The episode had started off with the Powah Rangers battling it out with a long, silver haired man. He was a mad scientist who'd kidnapped children off the streets and turned them into man eating hamsters. Violetta definitely did not want to meet a man like that. Ever. She liked her human body, thank you very much.

The walk from her home to the city wasn't very long. It normally took her around fifteen minutes at most. She entered her favorite café and purchased a strawberry banana smoothie, her favorite. She was just about to walk to the local park when she spotted it.

Or rather, him.

It was the villain from that morning's Powah Rangers episode. He was stalking an innocent civilian! Violetta slurped her smoothie at a speed faster than that of light itself. She then proceeded to whine about a brain freeze before tossing her empty cup into the trashcan and activating her super duper awesome stealth skills. Very, very quietly and unsuspiciously, might I add, she opened the door of the café and silently slipped out. She looked to the left, the right, and then back to the left.

When she deemed it safe, she began to stalk the mad scientist, following carefully, just a few feet behind him.

"Wooow!" She whispered, "This is like a dream come true! I've always wanted to be a detective!"

She ducked behind a parked car as the suspicious silver haired man turned around.

It wouldn't do any good to get caught so early, now would it?

* * *

Squalo scowled as he discreetly followed his teal haired target; the man named Flinn. He was ordered to eliminate the illusionist, but was told to keep his child out of harm's way. It was a troublesome request, but orders were orders.

If he were to be really honest, Squalo would say that he hated these missions the most; the ones where he was ordered to destroy a family. After all, Squalo himself had lost his mother to had assassin that one of his father's jealous girlfriends had hired.

If he were to kill at all, he'd rather kill the entire family so that no one would have to live in pain and from what he'd gathered out of the file he was given before the mission; the Fran kid had already lost his mother many years ago.

Squalo actually felt a little guilty, taking away the kid's remaining parent too.

Honestly, Mammon should've known better than to give Squalo this specific mission. The arcobaleno _was_ aware of his familial background. Or at least he should've, considering he knew _everything_ (including Squalo's measurements….down there, you know where…yeah, he still didn't know exactly how the man-child found out because even Squalo himself didn't know!) Mammon was really fucking creepy now that Squalo really thought about it.

Squalo slowed his steps down as he began to pick up on a presence following after him.

His scowl deepened and he was positive that if that gay shit, Lussuria were there, he'd probably try to force Squalo's face into something that resembled a smile while exclaiming something stupid like, "Squ-chan~ You shouldn't make those faces so often~ Your face might get stuck like that!"

Quickly, Squalo turned around to see if he could catch his stalker.

He found nothing.

Slowly, Squalo turned back around and from the corner of his eye, he spotted a small figure dart out from behind a parked car.

"Hehhh? This guy's not that good." He frowned, "And why the fuck was he so tiny? Did someone send a fucking Bovino after me? Did they honestly fucking think that I'd be defeated by a freakin Bovino?"

Squalo scoffed and motioned for one of his Rain troopers subordinates to follow after the target for him whilst he took care of the Bovino kid. He looked up at the roof of a building not too far away and nodded at his sniper.

* * *

Violetta frowned as she looked at her surroundings, noticing that the suspicious silver haired man had led her into an abandoned building.

She was confused at first as to why the man had left his stalking target to come to this place, but soon enough, she realized what exactly this building was and a grin began to grow on her face.

"This is it," She whispered , "This is his secret lair! THIS IS WHERE HE TURNS INNOCENT PEOPLE INTO HAMSTERS!"

Violetta narrowed her eyes at the man as he entered the abandoned building.

Her mother often told her to stay away from this area of Paris, as it was a very shady part of town, but she was sure that her mother would understand if she told her that she'd only ventured so far into the town for justice.

She could already see it, her face on the newspaper and all over the different T.V. stations.

She would be known to the rest of the universe as Earth's number one detective!

After a few minutes of daydreaming, Violetta finally decided to enter the building.

She tiptoed and quietly as she could to the door. Slowly, she pushed it open, grimacing when she heard its loud squeak. She hoped that the man was too busy conducting inhumane experiments to hear the door open—

But she hoped for too much.

* * *

 **SLAM!**

* * *

Squalo pinned the girl against the wall, one hand on her throat, and the other about ready to draw his sword from within his trench coat.

"EEEP!" The girl squealed pathetically as he back slammed into the wall.

* * *

OH JESUS. OH FUCKING LORD BUDDHA SOMEONE SAVE HER.

Violetta clenched her eyes shut in fear.

What was she going to do?! THE MAN HAD HER! HE'D CAPTURED HER! HE WAS GOING TO TURN HER INTO A HAMSTER! SHE DIDN'T WANT TO BECOME A HAMSTER!

Slowly, she opened her eyes, and that was when she realized that the man wasn't the hamster scientist after all.

He definitely had the same hair as the villain from the Powah Rangers episode from that morning, but he was not him. In fact, under different circumstances, Violetta might've even have thought that the man was attractive. He certainly did have a nice face. And he was tall. Way taller than she was.

She _was_ only just brushing against 153 centimeters after all.

* * *

Squalo blinked in surprise. He was expecting some scrawny little Bovino kid. Not an untrained little girl.

And what was she? Like ten? She was fucking tiny!

He couldn't believe that he was actually paranoid of her!

He stared blankly at the girl who had started rambling in rapid fire French. He was deemed fluent enough in French to qualify for the Varia, but she had been speaking too fast for him to understand.

It was freaking hilarious to watch anyway, though.

Slowly, Squalo released his old on the girl's neck. She stared up at him with wide eyes.

"Are you going to rape me?" She squeaked.

Then he fucking lost it.

"Pfffftt…" Squalo let out a small huff of air, confusing the much younger girl, before he threw his head back and started laughing.

* * *

Violetta could feel her face heating up at the man's close approximation as he'd begun to laugh so hard than he needed to lean against the wall… _andhappenedtointimatelytrapherbetweenhimandthesaidwall._

She also began to relax, after deeming him safe. He hadn't hurt her so far and she decided that she liked his voice.

"Voi," The man muttered after he'd calmed down, and _hotdamnthatvoicejesuschrist,_ "Did you really think that I was going to rape you?"

Violetta had never thought before that French was a very romantic language but _ohbuddhahisFrenchwasmagical._

"U-um…well are you? Because I promise you, I'll give you my first born child if you don't!"

* * *

Once again, Squalo found himself laughing his ass off because he literally did not know how to deal with the situation.

"I'm not going to fuckin' rape you. " He scoffed, "I'm not into little girls."

"I AM NOT A LITTLE GIRL!" Violetta sputtered indignantly, "I am fourteen years old, mister!"

"Hah?" Squalo leaned back and eyed the girl up and down, "You look ten."

"E-EXCUSE ME?!" She sputtered, "IS IT BECAUSE I'M SHORT?! IS THAT IT?! WELL, I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT I AM A PRACTITIONER OF PANDA STYLE KUNG FU, COUTESY OF THIS ONE CARTOON I WATCHED."

The older man raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. So what if the chick learned kung-fu from a child's cartoon? He was a _master swordsman._

"DO YOU WANT TO FIGHT, RAPUNZAL? HUH? HUH? SQUARE UP, PRINCESS, SQUARE UP. I WILL FIGHT YOU."

"I doubt you'd win," Squalo smirked, crossing his arms over his chest, "How about you just run along now since I don't feel like killing you?"

Violetta blinked in surprise. Was that a veiled threat? Was he implying something?

"Are you threatening me?" Her lips curled downward, "I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT I AM THE WORLD'S NUMBER ONE BESTEST SUPER-DETECTIVE AND IF I WERE TO GO MISSING, EVERYONE WOULD GO SEARCHING FOR ME!" She screeched, a finger jabbing into his chest with every word.

Actually, even after she was done talking, she kept rhythmically poking him.

Squalo's eye twitched. Was she being serious?

"VOII!" He shouted, making her flinch and jump back a little, "WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO STOP FUCKING POKING ME, YOU LITTLE SHIT?! AND IN WHAT FUCKING PLANET WERE YOU CONSIDERED THE WORLD'S BEST DETECTIVE BECAUSE EVEN I, A MEMBER OF THE VARIA HAVE NOT HEARD OF YOU!"

"W-WELL, THE SIMS OBVIOUSLY!" The girl replied, a pout on her lips, "What did you think I was talking about? I'm fourteen, did you honestly think that I'm really a detective? And what the hell are the Varia? Are they a government group because as someone aspiring to work as a detective for the French government, I have never even heard of you."

Squalo felt himself giving the girl the same look he gave Lussuria every morning when he encountered the homo wearing his weird skin mask thing while cooking breakfast.

He gave her the, "Are-you-fucking-serious " look.

"OH MY GOD. IS THERE A GOVERNMENT GROUP I DON'T KNOW ABOUT?! ARE YOU GUYS LIKE SUPER ELITES OF THE ELITE?! OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, DID I INTERRUPT YOUR SECRET MISSION OR SOMETHING, I AM SO SORRY, SIR, I DID NOT MEAN TO."

He actually did not know what to say anymore. For someone who was seemingly unaware of the mafia, she was actually pretty spot on with her deduction.

"Hey…" Violetta peered up at the man once more, "Can I like…can I have your number or something? I think it'd look really cool on my Worlds-Best-Detective resume if I stated that I knew someone from the Varia."

"No, are you fucking stupid?!" Squalo scoffed, "IF WE'RE A SECRET ORGANIZATION, THEN YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO KNOW ABOUT US. IF YOU PUT THAT YOU KNOW ME IN YOUR FUCKING RESUME OR WHATEVER, THEY'D PROBABLY JUST KIDNAP YOU AND TORTURE YOU FOR INFORMATION ON HOW YOU KNOW ME."

"E-EH? LEGIT?!"

 _Yes, legit. Because the French government will be wandering why you know of an elite Italian Mafia group, but it's not like you needed to know that or anything._

"Tell you what," Squalo sighed after seeing her crestfallen face, "I'll give you my personal phone number. But you have to swear on your life that you won't ever call me. Ever. And you must never tell anyone, under any circumstances, that you know the Varia."

"OH MY GOD, THIS IS SO GREAT." Violetta let out a joyful screech, effectively damaging the Varia commander's ability to hear, "I SWEAR ON MY FIRST BORN CHILD AND MY SOUL THAT I WILL TELL NO ONE OF WHAT HAD OCCURED TODAY."

Squalo rolled his eyes before snatching the girl's phone from her hand and entering his number.

"Call me whatever the fuck you want. Just don't put my real name."

Violetta grinned as she entered RAPUNZAL into the name slot of his contact page, "Sure, but I still don't know your real name…so unless you want me to call you Rapunzal in public to-"

"VOIIIIII! MY NAME IS FUCKING SUPERBI SQUALO! REMEMBER THAT YOU TINY STACK OF SHIT!"

"EXCUSE YOUR FACE, PRINCESS, I AM NEITHER TINY OR A STACK OF SHIT."

"WELL DO I FUCKING LOOK LIKE A MOTHERFUCKING PRINCESS TO YOU?!"

"YEAH! AN UGLY PRINCESS!"

Squalo mentally groaned. What had he gotten himself into?

"Alright. You have my fucking number, not get the fuck outta here so I can complete my fuckin' mission."

* * *

 _ **4:59 PM  
**_ **From** : Short Stack of Shit  
 **To** : RAPUNZAL

 _HEY DO YOU WANT TO MEET UP LATER, PRINCESS?!_

 _ARE YOU DONE WITH YOUR MISSION?_

 _DO YOU LIKE STRAWBERRY BANANA SMOOTHIES?_

 _CAN I BRAID YOUR HAIR?_

 _DO YOU WANNA WATCH A MOVIE WITH ME?_

 _ **5:03 PM  
**_ **From** : RAPUNZAL  
 **To** : Short Stack of Shit

 _NO._

 _YES._

 _NO._

 _NO._

 _NO._

 _WHY THE FUCK ARE WE TYPING IN ALL CAPS?  
AND WHAT THE SHIT IS YOUR NAME IN THE FIRST PLACE? I HAVE YOU SAVED AS SHORT STACK OF SHIT. _

_**5:05 PM  
**_ **From** : Short Stack of Shit  
 **To** : RAPUNZAL

 _WOW. YOU'RE REALLY RUDE. I REMEMBERED YOUR NAME, SQUALO._

 _ **5:06 PM  
**_ **From** : RAPUNZAL  
 **To** : Short Stack of Shit

 _VOI. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO REMEMBER IF YOU NEVER INTRODUCED YOURSELF IN THE FIRST PLACE?_

 _ **5:07 PM  
**_ **From** : RAPUNZAL  
 **To** : Short Stack of Shit

Hey, you're not mad are you?

 _ **5:15 PM  
**_ **From** : RAPUNZAL  
 **To** : Short Stack of Shit

 _VOI. ANSWER ME YOU LITTLE PIECE OF SHIT OR I'LL NEVER TEXT YOU AGAIN._

 _ **5:30 PM  
**_ **From** : RAPUNZAL  
 **To** : Short Stack of Shit

 _VOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII._

 _ **5:31 PM  
**_ **From** : Short Stack of Shit  
 **To** : RAPUNZAL

 _OH MY BUDDHA. I WAS JUST EATING DINNER. CALM YOUR PRINCESS TITTIES.  
Don't tell me you were actually worried about little old me..? :PP_

 _I actually forgot that I never introduced myself. My name is Violetta Valentine, nice to meet you Superbi Squalo. Hope we can be great friends!_

 _ **5:31 PM  
**_ **From** : RAPUNZAL  
 **To** : Violetta Valentine

 _NO. I WAS NOT WORRIED. YOURE FUCKING STUPID._

 _i regret meeting you and letting you live  
i hope you die in a ditch or some shit_

 _ **5:31 PM  
**_ **From** : Violetta Valentine  
 **To** : RAPUNZAL

 _WHY ARE YOU SO MEAN TO ME?! DDD:_

 _ **5:31 PM  
**_ **From** : RAPUNZAL  
 **To** : Violetta Valentine

 _IM NOT FUCKING MEAN AND YOU FUCKING DESERVE IT_

 _ **5:31 PM  
**_ **From** : Violetta Valentine  
 **To** : RAPUNZAL

 _WHAT DID I EVER DO?!_

 _ **5:31 PM  
**_ **From** : RAPUNZAL  
 **To** : Violetta Valentine

 _YOU WERE BORN_

 _ **5:36 PM  
**_ **From** : Violetta Valentine  
 **To** : RAPUNZAL

 _=_= Meet me at La Closeirie des Lilas tomorrow at 1 PM.  
If you don't, face my wrath. _

_I'm serious._

 _ **5:40 PM  
**_ **From** : RAPUNZAL  
 **To** : Violetta Valentine

 _WHAT THE FUCK?!_

 _THAT PLACE IS REALLY EXPENSIVE?! ARE YOU FUCKING RICH OR SOMETHING?! ARE YOU PAYING?_

 _ **5:41 PM  
**_ **From** : Violetta Valentine  
 **To** : RAPUNZAL

 _HAHAHAHA, FUNNY YOU SHOULD ASK, RAPUNZAL._

 _YOU MAY BE AN ELITE GOVERNMENT OFFICIAL,_

 _BUT I, THE GREAT VIOLETTA VALENTINE, AM THE DAUGHTER OF A TOP CLASS MODEL AND A BRAIN SURGEON_

 _IM ROLLIN IN GREEN_

 _ **5:42 PM  
**_ **From** : RAPUNZAL  
 **To** : Violetta Valentine

 _Shit. So uh, lets say i actually did kill you earlier…?_

 _ **5:42 PM  
**_ **From** : Violetta Valentine  
 **To** : RAPUNZAL

 _The entirety of Europe would be trackin' your ass down within about 24 hours. :33_

 _ **5:42 PM  
**_ **From** : RAPUNZAL  
 **To** : Violetta Valentine

 _I'll see you tomorrow._

 _ **5:43 PM  
**_ **From** : Violetta Valentine  
 **To** : RAPUNZAL

 _I look forward to it!_

* * *

"Hey, Rapunzal." Violetta hummed as she braided the assassin's hair, days after their uh date.

"The fuck you want?" He asked as he flipped through files that she'd long given up on reading.

They were all written in Italian anyway.

"When are you going back home?"

"Whenever the fuck I feel like."

"…I'm moving to Japan in a few days."

Squalo paused. Slowly, he put down the files he'd been holding and craned his neck to look over his shoulder.

"Seriously? Can you even speak Japanese properly?" He asked, ignoring the whispers of _what a cute couple_ from passers.

Violetta sighed as she placed another one of the flowers she'd picked into his hair, "I can speak enough to get around."

"And what about school?"

"What are you, my mother?" She frowned, "I'll be fine."

"Where in Japan are you moving to?"

She giggled, "Why do you need to know? Are you going to move in with me?"

"VOIIIIII!"

"Namimori, Japan." She answered seriously and Squalo felt himself tensing, "It's gonna be pretty hard to get used to living in such a quiet place considering I'm from Paris."

Namimori, Japan…wasn't that where the Young Lion's son lived? Squalo scowled.

Why couldn't her parents have decided to move her somewhere else? Why was she moving to such a dangerous place?

"lo…Squalo…are you listening?"

"Yes, I'm fucking listening. Just fucking say it."

"I said that I'm going to miss you."

"The fuck?!"

Violetta said nothing as she secured the man's long hair with an elastic.

After a few more beats of silence, she sighed again before rising from her seated position and hugging the man from behind.

"I said that I'm going to miss you looooots and loooooots, Rapunzal."

"Why? It's not like we're never going to talk again, just fucking text me. You're making this more fucking dramatic than it should be."

That's when he heard her giggle a little into his ear and felt her chest tremble against his back. Her laugh reminded him of bells.

"I can always text you or video call, but we won't be seeing each other face to face anymore."

"So?"

"So then I won't be able to do this anymore!"

"What the fu-"

She pressed her lips against his cheek.

"Just be a good princess for me and wait, okay? I'll be your knight in shining armor."

* * *

 **A/N** : I DIDN'T MEAN TO DO THAT.

I REALLY DIDN'T.

SQUALO, YOU FREAKIN' CRADLE ROBBER.

SHE'S TOO YOUNG FOR YOU.


End file.
